I was about to compile my list of best rides for 2008, but then it dawned on me. There’s A LOT of bad cars out there this year. Let’s take a look:
Acura RL

The Acura Legend of 1986 was a turning point for Honda. Not only did it signal the birth of a new brand, but the arrival of a new V-6 engine as well. Over twenty years later, Acura is still relying on V-6 engines in their flagship model. That alone should sound the alarms.
Acura decided that names were not cool in the mid 1990s and decided to drop the Legend moniker in favor of the RL designation, which was slapped on to a late 1980s Mercedes S class sedan knock off. The second generation RL sedan proved a little more interesting, what with their SH (Super Handling) four wheel drive system, but still, a 3.5 liter V-6 was under the hood.
The 2008 model signals a facelift of the 2005 redesign and well, perhaps Acura would have been better off putting the RL out to pasture instead of introducing this rehashed version with a grille that looks like something with which you would julian carrots and taillights that ape the Mercedes SLR. Acura plans to put this new corporate mug on the rest of its lineup, as well. I’m sure there are plenty of people without taste who will scoop these things up.
BMW 135i

The new BMW 135i is, inherently, a good car. It has one fatal flaw: price. $34,900. That’s not exactly chump change for what is meant to be the starting point in a manufacturer’s vehicle lineup. It is also perilously close to the very handsome 328i coupe. Add in some options, and the price for a 135i can jump to over $40,000. Granted, this car goes, steers and brakes like a true BMW, which leaves pretty much nothing to be desired. It also features the much ballyhooed 3.0 turbo inline six, which cranks out 300 horsepower in a package the size of a Civic. This is a sure fire way to annoy local law enforcement.
If BMW was really serious about creating the 1 series as a descendant of the iconic 2002 from the 1960s and 1970s, this would have been the following formula:
1. Add the fabulous 2.0 liter four cylinder engine from the European market 320si, a model designed as a homologation special to qualify for the FIA World Touring Car Championship. This would bring the car more in line with the simplistic values the 1 is trying to trumpet.
2. Delete stuff from the options list such as leather interior, heated seats, sunroof, upgraded stereos and that horrid i-Drive system. Less weight equals better performance and enhanced fuel economy.
3. Give customers the option for upgraded suspension components, brakes, tires, etc.
4. Bring over the 1 series hatchback that is verboten in North America in limited numbers, to test the waters. Many people who buy small cars don’t like coupes/convertibles.
5. Put in a 350 degree oven for 20 minutes and voila. The 120si is born. The TRUE descendant of the 2002tii.
My advice, if you really want a 1 series, the 128i coupe is more than enough. With a starting price of $28,600, it’s a better value and with the 3.0, 230 hp version of BMWs inline six, you’re not going to lose many stoplight battles.
BMW X6

File this one under the “what were they thinking” category. Two BMWs to avoid in one year?!? Surely I jest. However, BMW continues down the path of disappointment for me, as of late, with the introduction of yet another SUV, or rather, I should say, Sports Utility Coupe. Right. Whatever.
The first X6 to appear will include BMW’s 3.5 liter twin turbo inline six, 6 speed automatic and hill descent control. Really? Are you really going to try off roading with 19” rims with low profile rubber? I thought so. So here we have another truck with a low slung roofline for people who like “the idea” of the outdoors.
Chrysler Sebring/Dodge Avenger

Daimler dumped Chrysler for good reason. Why stick around when your acquired brand keeps turning out duds like this? Admittedly, a lot of the Chrysler lineup in recent years is some of America’s best (see 300, Crossfire and Challenger, for example). However, Chrysler never did get it when it came to mainstream, mid sized vehicles. The innovative cab forward LH sedans are long gone and now we are stuck with the Sebring and Avenger, two cars that suddenly make the Communist era, 2 cycle engined Trabant look appealing.
Where to start? Bad build quality, half assed design, plasticky trim and unrefined powerplants are hallmarks of these sedans. While the Sebring isn’t exactly the best looking vehicle on the road, at least it is tolerable. The Avenger, however, is an aberration. Honestly, the only people I think that would find the styling of this car appealing would be the Blockheads from the Gumby cartoons.
I beg of you, avoid this pair at all costs.
Ford Focus

Look up garbage in the dictionary. Beside it, you will see an image of the 2008 Ford Focus. Never one to disappoint, Ford has laid another egg in the small car market. Just because this car has tons of plastic chrome all over it and the Microsoft SYNC system doesn’t mean it’s a winner. It’s the same old song, really. Cheap plastic, sub par build quality and uninspiring performance. While the original Focus was brought to the U.S. virtually unchanged, over the years, it evolved into a caricature of itself. Now we get a cheap imitation of the superb new Focus that is on sale right now in Europe.
If you are really dying for a small car from Ford, wait another year or two until the redesigned, European market Ford Fiesta arrives on these shores. It will prove to be a better drive.
Jeep Compass/Patriot

Not even the best photographer privy to the most beautiful scenery could distract someone from the fact that these SUVs are possibly the most hideous vehicles on the U.S. new car market today. At the end of 2001, Jeep pulled the plug on what was essentially an icon SUV of its time, the Cherokee. The Liberty, its weak kneed replacement, failed to entice and ever since Jeep has found itself trying to capture the magic of the good old days.
The Compass and Patriot share the same platform, which features a transversely mounted engine available in front or all wheel drive. The Compass has more progressive styling while the Patriot tries to ape the original boxiness of the Cherokee. No matter. They both suck. Note the weak powerplants, poor gas mileage and an interior that makes a medium security penitentiary look appealing. Then thank me for saving you from throwing your hard earned money down the drain.
Lexus Hybrids

The Lexus hybrids are for poseur environmentalists, pure and simple. Even the most efficient hybrid in the lineup, the front wheel drive RX330h gets about the same gas mileage on a combined cycle as my V6 powered Mercedes-Benz C230 Sport Sedan. The thing about my Mercedes is that it is faster and can, of course, out corner the Lexus. The most ridiculous of all Lexus hybrids is the range topping, $104,765 (including delivery) LS 600h L. This “hybrid” barely squeaks out 20 miles to the gallon on a tank. Inspiring.
If Lexus wants to start making inroads into the green movement, their best bet would be to follow the tastes of the European market and bring their 4 cylinder IS220D (diesel) sedan here to the U.S market. Diesels have proven to be just as clean these days as hybrids, without much of the complexity. You also don’t have to worry about how to recycle the batteries which the electric drive systems run on. You have to wonder, what are all of these tree huggers going to do when those batteries die? Open up a museum?
Lexus IS-F

Having been distracted by hybrids, Lexus suddenly realized it was missing out on the fun when it came to compact executive performance machines. So welcome the IS-F, a V8 engined IS sedan strapped with an 8 (yes, eight) speed automatic. However, M3 drivers need not apply, since it is not as hard edged as it looks and sounds.
First, the styling. The hood has a hump higher than a camel’s back and the rest of the body cladding is too boy racer for the over $50,000 crowd. The stacked exhaust tips are just plain gimmicky. The interior, while appearing a bit sportier, is still geared towards the retirement crowd set that Lexus keeps squarely in its crosshairs.
What amuses me most, however, is how Lexus responded to an advertisement by Audi which mocked their automatic parallel parking feature (available on the LS sedan), showing an A4 sedan doing a 180 spin into a parallel spot and flashing the phrase on the screen “the luxury car for people who can park themselves.” Lexus downplayed it with a response along the lines of if you’ve got it, it doesn’t mean you have to flaunt it. Now we see Lexus doing an about face, acting like they know everything when it comes to high performance. Pick your battles, Lexus. The Germans have been doing high performance for years, and quite well, thank you. My advice? Stick to hybrids and your constituency in Boca Raton, Florida.
Mercedes SLR Roadster

The Mercedes SLR Roadster, admittedly, is not on most people’s short lists when they are kicking the tires on new car lots. This is a toy for the rich. However much of an engineering marvel this is, I can’t help but think its $495,000 price tag is over inflated, considering there are other vastly superior supercars, such as the fantastic Audi R8 and Ferrari F599 GTB Fiorano.
The SLR handles well, is a demon in a straight line and does just about everything extremely well. However, with and automatic gearbox and luxury accoutrements, it’s not quite the real deal. As a grand touring vehicle, it may pass muster, but even then it is probably a bit too hard edged for that market demographic.
Admittedly, another couple hundred thousand dollars for people who are spending almost half a million on a vehicle probably don’t care that cars like the more enticing and frankly more sporting Alfa Romeo 8C Competizione is more than $200,000 cheaper. But on plain performance merits, there are vastly better supercars out there for the money.
Nissan Maxima

The Nissan Maxima soldiers on for yet another model cycle and I still am perplexed as to where it belongs in the Nissan lineup. The Nissan Altima is just about as large and well equipped. The superb new Infiniti G37 is not much more expensive. With the Infiniti, you also get better handling balance with rear or all wheel drive.
The new restyle is, by any standards, bizarre. While the styling is different, different doesn’t always equate to tasteful. There are too many conflicting lines and creases in the bodywork, the optional rear deck lid spoiler is out of proportion and there is just a bit too much front overhang, which many front wheel drive cars suffer from. In sum, the Maxima was, at one point, a fine sports sedan. Advertisements from the late 1980s labeled it as the “four door sports car.” However, it has become too big, bloated and pricy for its own good. It is no longer worth the sheet metal from which it is built.
Scion xD

The Scion brand was created to bring a youthful base back to Toyota. The original lineup included the small and efficient xA hatchback and funky, purposeful and easily modded xB mini wagon. Shortly thereafter, the tC coupe, a fine little pocket rocket, joined these two in Scion showrooms.
With the xD, Toyota lost sight of the plot, which was to prove that cheap didn’t have to mean boring. The xD is a depressing replacement for the fresh looking xB, no matter how horrid a drive that car was. As with every car these days, it seems as if the xD is bloated in comparison to the xB. Much of the interior design is over exaggerated as well. Think of the xD as a less appealing Toyota Yaris for those who appreciate cubism.
Toyota Sequoia

Japan has an infatuation with Godzilla. What else could explain this hideously oversized vehicle?
The Sequoia, much like the Nissan Armada, has shown the Japanese are capable of pandering to fleeting market trends. Now these manufacturers find themselves in a pickle, as rising gas prices and tougher fuel economy standards are putting the hurt on the big SUV business. Perhaps it was the Big Three’s idea to run away with a stranglehold on the big SUV market, con the Japanese into taking their lead and then regress into building the smaller, more fuel efficient vehicles we have seen from them as of late.
At least it makes for a good conspiracy theory.